How to make boring sports interesting
If my soggy leathers and soaked boots are anything to go by, I suspect there will be no play in the cricket at Lords today. It's a shame, as having the commentary on in my headphones makes the day pass much quicker. There is another big sporting occasion on today (and tomorrow and Sunday as well), The Open Championship from Carnoustie. Now I really don't like golf, it could possibly be one of the dullest spectator sports. Listening to it on the radio, or watching the leaderboard online just takes it to a different level (sadly, in the wrong direction. 'South', I think you could describe it as). However, I've found a way to make it enjoyable.
Open up the leaderboard and scroll all the way to the bottom. Currently the leader is on -5 after 22 holes. At the bottom, in position 156, some poor sap is on +14 after 19 holes. He's just tee'ed off and hit a 6 on a par 4. Now that must be like waking up late for work, with a hangover, to find that there is no hot water, burning your toast, pour sour milk into your coffee, finding your car has a flat tyre so you have to walk to the station, in the rain, and then your train is delayed by an hour due to 'the driver being delayed on an incoming service'. I.e, it ain't going to be your day. I'm going to see what the biggest score on a single hole is. I'm hoping for double figures.
I must confess that I am a bit sick like that. When I lived in South Africa there was a famous running race that took place every year called the Comrades Marathon. It's a real bastard, run between Pietermaritzburg and Durban, which is about 90 kilometres. If memory serves me correctly, runners have 12 hours to complete the race. I used to tune in after 11 hours 59 minutes to watch some official stand on the finish line with his back to the runners, and when the clock ran out he'd fire a gun and the race was over. You should have seen the faces of these poor sods that have been running for 90 kilometres and 12 hours and were 10 feet short of the finish line when the gun went off. Oh happy days.
#156 has just parred the second, spoilsport.
Open up the leaderboard and scroll all the way to the bottom. Currently the leader is on -5 after 22 holes. At the bottom, in position 156, some poor sap is on +14 after 19 holes. He's just tee'ed off and hit a 6 on a par 4. Now that must be like waking up late for work, with a hangover, to find that there is no hot water, burning your toast, pour sour milk into your coffee, finding your car has a flat tyre so you have to walk to the station, in the rain, and then your train is delayed by an hour due to 'the driver being delayed on an incoming service'. I.e, it ain't going to be your day. I'm going to see what the biggest score on a single hole is. I'm hoping for double figures.
I must confess that I am a bit sick like that. When I lived in South Africa there was a famous running race that took place every year called the Comrades Marathon. It's a real bastard, run between Pietermaritzburg and Durban, which is about 90 kilometres. If memory serves me correctly, runners have 12 hours to complete the race. I used to tune in after 11 hours 59 minutes to watch some official stand on the finish line with his back to the runners, and when the clock ran out he'd fire a gun and the race was over. You should have seen the faces of these poor sods that have been running for 90 kilometres and 12 hours and were 10 feet short of the finish line when the gun went off. Oh happy days.
#156 has just parred the second, spoilsport.
posted by SkyBlueSnowy @ 11:11 am
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