Australians

There are many reasons to dislike Australians*. More reasons to dislike South Africans**, but that's a seperate post:

-They are all here. Now if I had the choice between wonderful weather, thousands of miles of snow white sands and coastline and girls who live in bikinis, I would choose to live in Brixton and work in an Irish pub every time. Yeah right.

-They have a nickname or shortened name for everything. Ute, barbie, pokies, ambo, arvo, dunny, the WACA, the Gabba etc.

-No Australian is called by his christened name. Dave-O, Steve-O, Mart-O etc.

-They claim to have invented the barbeque (sorry, barbie). I think the caveman who invented fire about 800 000 years ago might beg to differ.

-They beat everyone at sport, and go on and on and on and on about it. And on.

That's just a sample. The real reason follows:
I was watching a Tri-Nations match between Australia and New Zealand recently. High tension, a lot at stake, full stadium. The teams lined up, all sweaty and with death on their minds. The national anthems were sung with passion. Then one of the most wonderful sporting sights, the Haka. The Aussies lined up and watched these ripped and angry Kiwis laying down their traditional war challenge. It always sends a shiver down my spine and is indeed a wonderful spectacle. Challenge laid down, lots of cheering, isn't rugby great? (Rugby has grand tradition of singing. New Zealand have the Haka, Wales have 'Bread of Heaven', Ireland have 'Ireland's Call', Scotland have 'O Flower of Scotland' and England have 'Jerusalem' and 'Swing Low Sweet Chariot' (not sure how a cotton picker song is related to rugby, but there you go), South Africa have 'Ole ole ole ole, ole, ole. Ole ole' (sorry, had to throw that one in)). Then the loudspeakers started blaring out 'Waltzing Matilda'! What the fuck? Get a proper song you classless gimps.

* Now before you get shitty with me, I know a lot of Australians and they are all very very nice people. Ok?

** Guys, I'm kidding.